Blech

It has been stressful and crazy at work. This week is a sucky one anyway because it is approaching the anniversary of when I miscarried. And there is no news on the Adoption front. I was kind of hoping there would be so that I would have that to balance things out. Sigh. Nothing entertaining or good to say at the moment so I guess I'll say nothing.

That's my girl

Eden has decided she is going to be a Vet, a Dog trainer and a Cowgirl. When asked how she was going to manage all this she replied that she would train dogs on Monday and Tuesday. She would work as a cowgirl Thursday and Friday. On Saturday and Sunday she would be a vet. Her Nana suggested she might want to take the weekend off and be a vet some time during the week like Wednesday. Nope – she replied. Doctors and vets and those guys can charge more if you come on the weekend.

She has a future at Mega corp I think.

LOVE this site

Bureau of Communication Here's the first form I have used:



I totally think I should send this - your thoughts?

Andi found the site so all props to her.

A Rock and a Hard Place

Edward's mom offered to put our daughter in private school starting this school year. I thought it was a bad idea at the time but her mom was all for it and Edward was too so I voiced some quiet concern but let it go. As I expected - it is now causing complications. The thing is - as much as I like to use this blog to vent about family sometimes, I really do see both sides of most of the issues. Its just not as much fun to write out both sides fairly as it is to blow off steam. Not as interesting to read most likely too - so -I'm sorry. I am being fair on this post not just venting.

Nana feels like - since all of us would like her to be able to attend private school, others should be pitching in for special fees, uniforms, books etc. I understand that - it is very expensive to put a kid in private school and she already paid for her two kids to go. On the other hand, we have always planned that she would go when she was older - maybe for middle probably for high school. That would give us several years to budget and save - not only for her high school tuition but for college as well. Nana offered to send her now, we did not ask, and if we had extra for this right now - we'd already be doing it right now.

SIGH

I really do know that my In Laws - all of them - love Eden with all their hearts and sincerely want the very best for her. Unfortunately - we don't all agree on what that is sometimes. I think switching back and forth between schools multiple times is going to be very bad for her - she struggles making friends some times right now and her feelings are still very easily bruised. Kids are not easy on newcomers. And I know there is no way Edward and I can swing tuition in the next two or three years. Even if we took her out of Tae Kwon Do - which she loves and I do not want to do I'm not sure we could swing it. And trying to scrape that together would leave nothing for us to save for any kind of college fund. So there's a more than even chance she is going to end up having to go back to public school for awhile.

I wish I could just tell them (and my family too for that matter - my mom is terrible!) to stop buying all the clothes and toys they pick up for her all the time and concentrate on just contributing to a couple of things that will really matter to her - her school fund, the riding lessons she loves (nana does help with these), the Tae Kwon Do. But you just cannot do that. You cannot tell someone else how to spend their money. If they want to give - even though its your child - they give what THEY want - that is their right. And, honestly, I feel guilty even thinking about complaining - because they are incredibly generous with Eden. More than I would ever expect. So its a problem with no solution.

See - I knew just bitching would have been more fun.

Read the fine print

Edward and I took Eden to the county fair recently. After a long evening of hot dogs, candy apples, over priced games and multiple spins on the various rides, we announced that it was time to go. Eden asked if she could ride two more rides. Sounds reasonable – we agreed. She then proceeded to explain that the bouncy hut was not a “ride” since she was not on or in anything that moved. The same as true of the giant slide - that's just gravity. And the fun house – while it did have stairs and a walk way that moved up and down, were not actually “ridden” but just passed over with her “own feet”. Therefore she should be able to do those three things and then her two approved “rides” before we left. Also games are just things you play - not rides right?

Edward just died laughing. I informed her that they all qualified as “entertainment activities” and she could choose two more “entertainment activities” before we went home.

Irrational

I want news. I want news now, Now, NOW DAMN IT! Which I know is completely and totally irrational. We just got news. We know what region we have been assigned to and I have always expected and been prepared for the fact that this would be a very long process with huge periods of total radio silence. So what is the deal with this sudden mood? I think it is an unhappy convergence of a bunch of things.

Number 1 - I joined some Internet groups related to adoption and heard some of the unusual stories of people who got assigned to a region and had a referral like two weeks later. When you think everyone is going through the same torturous drawn out process there is a sense of inevitability to it all - its easier to accept. But when some one appears to have "jumped the line" as it were- Well now, that's just not fair!!! Not that I'm not happy for them - and who knows what long drawn out and possible painful path they took to that point. they may really have DESERVED that break. But still.

Number 2 - My mom has kicked into baby frenzy mode. She has been out buying up the baby universe. I keep telling her, "Ma - we have no idea what size this kid is going to be! Ma - Helllloooo - Mother - Are you in there?" Her reply? "Don't worry - It was a great sale - I just bought one of every size." The baby home in Tomsk is going to get one hell of a donation of clothes is all I can say.

Number 3 - Work, my number one distractor from this process, has hit our summer lull. It's not that I don't have a million and one things I could be doing. It's just that none of them are particularly URGENT and I always focus better and am more productive in "crunch" mode.

Number 4 - Insensitive Pregnant Woman from work has turned into Insensitive New Mom who keeps bringing her adorable baby by and dropping him in my arms while she flits off to visit with others. (The whole make her ass as big as a bus campaign my evil twin came up with was successful by the way lumbers off my be more fitting that flits at this point.) I'm having trouble fighting off the urge to run off with her kid to Wyoming and start over as a truck stop waitress / single mom. But that would probably screw with the whole adoption thing, eh?

So, I guess I'll just have to keep posting about random crap like ancient history dating disasters, the insanity of corporate America, family dramas, yadda, yadda, yadda in a vain attempt to distract myself. But, damn, do I want news.

Oh, I can SOOOOOO Win This One!

I never win contests, sweepstakes, lotteries, or even bingo. Of course, its been years since I used to play Bingo with my Mom and Grandma. But this contest, this I got a better than even shot at. They are having a "Worst Date Ever" contest sponsored by Restaurant Refugee. The only problem is - which one do I choose? There are SOOOO many. Do I go with the guy who only talked about is 16 hunting dogs, or the married Law professor (no he did not TELL me he was married before the date - I do not poach) who wanted to leave the musical we were at at intermission because some friends(who knew his wife)had spotted him? Then he was surprised when we got back to my place that I was not going to invite him in!!!

No - I know - the mother of all bad dates was the "drunken emergency room you'd be the perfect daughter in law" fiasco. It starts like this. I was dating this guy casually and he suggested we do a late dinner one Friday night. He was having some "temporary transportation issues" and asked if I would drive. I said sure and we planned for me to pick him up at about 7:30. This was in the early winter and by 7:30 it was pretty dark. Which is why, as I swung into his driveway, I almost missed seeing the heap laying in the middle of it. But fortunately I did not. Fortunately, I say because said heap was my date, passed out dead drunk.

Any sane woman would have backed out and went on about her business but it was cold and I'm a sucker so I started trying to get him on his feet with the notion of getting him through his door and then going about my business. Unfortunately, in addition to being drunk and clumsy he was also heavy and when I inevitably dropped him he cracked his head hard enough on the pavement to split it open and begin bleeding profusely. Did you know that alcohol acts is a blood thinner? And head wounds - well they bleed quite a bit anyway. So, now I feel like I can't just dump him in his door. So I drag, push, and cajole him into my car and drive to the emergency room. Drunkass fades in and out of consciousness for the 20 minute ride but perks up as we pull into the hospital.

"What the fuck are we doing here?" My charming, bleeding, escort slurs.
"Getting your head looked at dumb ass." I reply.
"No fucking way"
"Yes fucking way! Get your drunk ass out of my car or I'll go get security to drag it out."

This is where Drunkass informs me that in addition to being drunk he is also as high as a kite and has the remains of the eight ball he and his buddies had been doing on him IN MY CAR, so I might want to rethink involving security and or the police. SHIT!!

I decide to take him home. Since he returned to bleeding all over my car and fading in and out of consciousness for the trip - I will admit that I considered, only briefly, just opening the door and shoving him out as we zipped along but I refrained. Don't give me too much credit as a humanitarian though. I was afraid if he died of exposure or blood loss they could some how tie him to me - oh, maybe through the DNA he was leaving all over my car seats. Similar concerns about him ending up dead just inside his door started me thinking what else I could possibly do with him.

Leave him at a gas station or Mc Donald's? No, most have security cameras - again they could potentially get me for negligence if not more. Then I remembered. My co worker's sister was friends with his mom. (I live in the South OK? In the boonies in the South - this counts as a relationship here.) I knew where she lived. Surely she was more responsible for his drunk ass than I was. I pulled up in front of his momma's house and at first the plan worked like a dream. "Pardon me ma'am I work with Kitty's sister? I saw your son laying by the road - he's hurt but he wouldn't let me take him to the hospital." She sent her husband out to collect Drunkass and got him settled on the couch. This is where it went bad again.

She insisted on making me some tea for my trouble. Then she began to tell me the loseriffic story of Drunkass's life. I tried to escape but she clung to me crying and musing about how different his life could be if only he had the right reason to straighten up. When she started in on how "marrying some nice girl" like me was just what Drunkass needed, I ran out of there like the hounds of hell were pursuing me.

The truly sad part is that while this is the worst date I've been on I can't really say he is the worst guy whose tried to date me. The worst guy that asked me out would be the one who was wanted for second degree murder and killed himself in a hotel room the police cornered him in. But, well, I'm not sure he counts really since there was no actual date. I mean, I found out about all this on the news the day after he asked me out - so really- I never did go out with him.

Perspectives, cont.

Got busy with Mega Corp business earlier and could not finish my post. So here goes:

Those that keep up with the news have probably seen a bit about what is going on with Russia and Georgia. If not - here - go check it out. We'll wait.

So, here's my two cents on this. Dubbya, McCain, Obama et al should shut the hell up. This is hardly the first time some pipsqueak nation thought it could invade an even smaller neighbor who happened to have a powerful friend and got its ass kicked. (Um, Iraq invading US allied Kuwait ring any bells?) It's hypocritical of us to try to claim we have some moral high ground on this topic.

And while I may be accused of being biased - since I am concerned that our nation's rhetoric not affect US Russian relations to the point that our adoption is impacted - there are other more neutral parties starting to take a critical look at Georgia's actions as well.

Perspectives

Transported to a surreal landscape, a young girl kills the first woman she meets and then teams up with three complete strangers to kill again.
-- Rick Polito, Marin Independent Journal's TV listing for "The Wizard of Oz"

Talk about a BAD idea.

So you know me right, always poking around trying to plan things out, research everything to the Nth degree, etc. Well, maybe you don't know me but take my word for it - that's me.

Also if I've ever talked to you about the adoption process you'll know that we pretty much expect that the child we will receive must be older than six months because Russia lists them for six months on a national data base.




Are you making the connection yet?




Yep - After mega searching I found the national database site. And after spending a TON of time decoding enough of the Cyrillic to figure out how to work it - I can now search for photos of the children in baby homes in the region we have been assigned to. Oh, what a BAD idea. On so very many levels.

A - These children are listed primarily so they can determine if there is family they should be reunited with and secondary for domestic placement. So the chances of seeing the child we are actually referred is slim.

B - You cannot "choose" a child so letting yourself look at the photos and be drawn to, or worse yet get attached to, one or an other of them for what ever reason (Oh doesn't he look just like Eden!! Oh what a smile. You get the picture) is so not going to end well.

C - If my boss finds out how much Mega Corp time I have burned on this little project he will kick my ASS!!! And rightly so. I wouldn't put up with my employees wasting this much time.

So, Question of the Day - Am I being sensible?

Take a guess.

Go ahead.

Take your time.

I'll be busy researching how to photo shop my favorite pictures so I know how they will look over time. Want to recognize them when I get there don't you know.

Pack your long johns Honey -

We're going to Siberia! Don't know when yet but with an annual average temp of 30 degrees Fahrenheit, I'm pretty sure it's gonna be cold regardless.



We got notified today that we are registered for our adoption in the city and region of Tomsk. (one of the United Siberian states - who knew Siberia had states?!?) So you can expect to learn more about that in the days to come as I study up on it. For now Tomsk, the city, is just a drop south of (correction a tad north east of) Novibursk on the map above. Tomsk, the state, includes Novibursk the city - I think. I'll try to find a breakdown of just the Siberian States.

I am THRILLED in spite of the fact that I told my husband just last night that the weather sounded so much nicer in some other regions. But I don't care! Bring it on - paperwork, humongous expenses, Siberian winter, all of it.

Now, here's something I've been debating - should I give my blog address to our agency for listing on their blog roll? This blog is not your typical adoption blog in that A - I talk about a lot of stuff besides adoption - I basically have verbal diarrhea here, and B - well y'all see a totally different side of me than the spiffy polished one that went into the home study. I'll have to mull that one a bit longer. Might not be in my best interest to share.

More Evil

Sharing that little convo I had with Friend 1 reminded me of another triumph my evil twin managed to perpetrate on him. (And which he promptly began doing unto others!) See Friend 1, oh hell let's give him a name. Um - OK, not good at this. How about we call him O'Malley? He's Irish so that works. O'Malley can fix and / or build anything. He has always been the leader of our Habitat for Humanity crew and taught me everything I know about hanging drywall, roofing and trim work. Seriously - he built his own plane. Not a model plane, an honest to god fly it ride in it plane. I never rode in it though. Not that I don't trust his skill and all, but I know how much he likes his beer when "tinkering".

Which brings us to the point of this little ramble. See O'Malley was home alone one sunny Saturday, enjoying some brew, when his Satellite TV went on the fritz. So he decided to get up on the roof and tinker with the satellite dish. Before I go further, I feel compelled by our deep and abiding friendship to point out that he did successfully fix the issue with the satellite dish. However, as he was starting down the ladder, beer in one hand, soldering iron and miscellaneous gear in the other (yes, he has his own soldering iron and yes, I have borrowed it to fix my DVD player - what of it?) he missed a rung and fell two stories. On Monday, one broken shoulder later, he shared the story with me. He was mortified not over the fall or injury but that, drunk and with a broken shoulder, he was unable to get up and drive himself to the emergency room but had to yell for his neighbor to come help him.

Being such a good friend, I felt compelled to find some way to both cheer him up AND encourage his physical well being. So, at my evil twin's prompting, I signed him up for our corporate ladder safety training. See Mega Corp has an on line class for EVERYTHING. And I happen to know the HR person who puts in the requirements. You have to take your assigned classes or you get nagging e-mail reminders every other day. If you ignore them too long your boss gets them too. If a person does not complete all their required safety training each year their boss gets in trouble for not being safety conscious enough. Once you have a requirement assigned to you in the system you cannot EVER get it removed. Seriously - I still have to take blood born pathogens class every freaken year because I volunteered at the company blood drive once 5 years ago. So now he has to spend two hours reviewing the safe use of ladders every year for the rest of his career. He transferred divisions not that long ago and thought he had out run it but nope - showed up again just last week. The gift that keeps on giving. No wonder my friends all love my twin.

Shaking in my Shoes

My boss, who is currently traveling in Asia for the company, sent me a meeting notice this morning because he needs to have a private conversation with me Monday. I need to advise him what number to call me on to insure it is a private conversation.

But I shouldn't worry about it, its a good thing he needs to tell me.

He just cannot talk about it now by phone.

Or by e-mail.

Nor can it wait until he is back in town only three days later.




I am VERY afraid.

I don't see how this can be any good thing for ME - good for him maybe - good for the company certainly - but probably just going to equal more work for me. You know some kind of "opportunity" to sort out another problem for good old Mega corp - for the same pay of course.